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Grieving on Fathers Day – Every Story is Unique

Guest post by Pam Mezzina, Director of Capstone Center

I have been a grief counselor for the last 2 decades. That’s 20 years of helping people through Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, anniversaries and other holidays. These “tender” days can be very difficult for people mourning a loss. As Father’s Day approaches, I remember some poignant stories.

I remember working with a gentleman who had lost his father to cancer.  He had always had a conflicted relationship with his dad and was angry and puzzled to find that his father’s dying had not ended his tumultuous feelings. He had never heard the quote “death ends a life, but not a relationship.”  Part of his healing was realizing that he could no longer blame his father for the choices he now had to make. He would have to carry the weight of his own life and accept that his father, as imperfect as he was, had loved him the best way he knew how.

Another woman had taken care of her grandfather for years prior to his death. She sacrificed all her time, energy, even her sense of self, taking care of him. Distraught as she was when he died, she couldn’t shed a tear. She was lost and needed direction about how to reconnect with herself, with others, to find her own purpose and move on with her life. It was months before, during a Therapeutic Touch session, she had her first “Big Cry” as she called it. She was thrilled!

If you are grieving a special man in your life this Father’s Day, remember that your story, your relationship, your loss and their legacy is unique. If you need help coping with a loss, contact Capstone Center to learn about our counseling services. Visit www.connectwithcapstone.com or call (850) 219-8985.